You saw it cross the road with your own eyes. How many more chickens
have to cross the road before you believe it?
President Richard M. Nixon:
The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did not
cross the road.
Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesnt anyone ever think to
ask, What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the
I have just released the new Microsoft Chicken 2000, which will not only
cross roads, but it will lay eggs, file your important documents AND
balance your checkbook.
The question is not, Why did the chicken cross the road? but is rather,
Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our
haste to observe the chicken crossing?
Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in
such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.
It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees.
Rev. Louis Farrakhan:
The road, you will see, represents the black man. The chicken crossed
the black man in order to trample him and keep him down.
Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.:
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads
without having their motives called into question.
In my day, we didnt ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told
us that the chicken had crossed the road, and that was good enough for
The point is that the chicken crossed the road. Who cares why? The end
of crossing the road justifies whatever motive there was.
Whether the chicken crossed the road or the road moved beneath the
chicken depends upon your frame of reference.
Asking this question denies your own chicken nature.
Ralph Waldo Emerson:
The chicken did not cross the road it transcended it.
To die. In the rain.
I missed one?
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
Tomás de Torquemada:
Give me ten minutes with the chicken and Ill find out.
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, Thou
shalt cross the road. And the Chicken crossed the road, and there was
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in
dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, Ive not been told!
It didnt. I was playing golf with it at the time.
President Bill Clinton:
That depends on what your definition of the word cross is.