An exasperated caller to Dell Computer Tech Support
couldnt get her new Dell Computer to turn on. After ensuring
the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what
happened when she pushed the power button.
Her response, I pushed and pushed on this foot pedal and
nothing happens. The foot pedal turned out to be the
Another customer called Compaq tech support to say her
brand-new computer wouldnt work. She said she unpacked the
unit, plugged it in, and sat there for 20 minutes waiting for
something to happen. When asked what happened when she pressed
the power switch, she asked What power switch?
Compaq is considering changing the command Press Any Key
to Press Return Key because of the flood of calls asking where
the Any key is.
AST technical support had a caller complaining that her
mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover
turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
Another Compaq technician received a call from a man
complaining that the system wouldnt read word processing files
from his old diskettes. After trouble-shooting for magnets and
heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the
customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into the
typewriter to type the labels.
Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her
defective diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the
customer along with Xeroxed copies of the floppies.
A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled
floppy back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked
the tech to hold on, and was heard putting the phone down,
getting up and crossing the room to close the door to his room.
Another Dell customer called to say he couldnt get his
computer to fax anything. After 40 minutes of trouble-shooting,
the technician discovered the man was trying to fax a piece of
paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and hitting
the send key.
Another Dell customer needed help setting up a new
program, so a Dell tech referred him to the local Egghead. Yeah,
I got me a couple of friends, the customer replied. When told
Egghead was a software store, the man said, Oh, I thought you
meant for me to find a couple of geeks.
Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his
keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his
tub with soap and water and soaking the keyboard for a day, then
removing all the keys and washing them individually.
A Dell technician received a call from a customer who was
enraged because his computer had told him he was bad and an
invalid. The tech explained that the computers bad command
and invalid responses shouldnt be taken personally.