1. You know someone who went to Chaminade.
2. Jones Beach Theater is the best place in the world to see a concert. CASE CLOSED!
3. Is it just me, or is every girl from Rockville Centre a bitch?
4. Billy Joel said it best, "either you date a rich girl from the North Shore, or a cool girl from the South Shore."
5. What's the big deal about the Hamptons?
6. If you're not from Long Island or NYC, you're not really from New York.
7. You don't go to Manhattan, you go to "the City"
8. The Belt Parkway sucks!
9. You never, ever want to "change at Jamaica..."
10. You never realize you have an accent until you leave.
11. Nathan's and Carvel
12. 11A. Friendly's
13. There's never anything to do.... Come on now.... Think about what you just said.
14. News 12 sucks.
15. You know where at least one strip club is.
16. Regular gas - $1.30
17. You can name at least three bands that came from Long Island.
18. You curse. A lot.
19. Is Huntington really that cool?
20. You've been to Utopia at least once.
21. Pizza Supreme (The pizza place that used to be in Roosevelt Field years ago)
22. Does anyone know why the HOV lane on the LIE stops in Hicksville instead of the Northern State?
23. The goddamn geese are everywhere!
24. If your parents didn't, your grandparents lived in the city.
25. At some point in your life you or someone you know has owned an animal that came from North Shore Animal League.
26. Italian ices and bomb pops.
27. The feast.
28. If you're from Nassau County, unless you were a deprived child you've been to Safety Town.
29. If you smoke pot, or you know people that smoke pot.
30. You've heard about it, talked about it, but does anyone really know where the Rockaway Drive-thru is?
31. If you're from Long Island, chances are you don't have to go far to see your family.
32. The Parkways, the LIE, the Causeway, Robert Moses Bridge, 110, 25A, Deer Park Ave., Old Country Rd., Jericho Tpke, Hempstead Tpke. Northern Blvd., Sunrise Hwy, Vets Hwy.
33. You actually remember when you felt safe swimming at Bar Beach and Hempstead Harbor.
34. Commack movie theatre scares you
35. You walk around the mall aimlessly.
36. You drive around your town with your friends, and that's the most exciting part of your evening.
37. You go play pool in Huntington.
38. On the weekend, your evening consists of seeing a movie, going bowling, or playing pool.
39. You know someone that smokes marijuana everyday, or more.
40. The homeless people on the street begin to have names.
41. Are those her real boobs?
42. Remember that night? The one that we drank.... Uh.... I don't remember....
43. Did you know that Long Island was once all potato fields?
44. Roosevelt Field wasn't always a mall.
45. When you walk in the city and you see two men holding hands...it becomes normal to you.
46. No word ends in an ER, just an AH.
47. You feel like you know Howard Stern.
48. You live in the shadow of the greatest city in the world, but you never go there.
49. When you're away from Long Island, you love it and when you're there, you don't.
50. You know that the beach sucks during the day and is the most magical place in the world at night
51. You know the exact point at which Queens turns into Nassau simply on intuition.
52. You're still waiting for a bridge to Connecticut.
53. You've tried to use your father's monthly ticket to ride the LIRR. It worked.
54. You'd pay $8.75 for a movie.
55. No matter what you do, you end up at the diner.
56. Your distant future might involve the state of Florida.
57. You've never really fully evaluated the meaning of the name Hicksville.
58. High school sports aren't that important.
59. You know where the Commack Motor Inn is but, you "have never been there".
60. You've never been to Times Square on New Year's Eve.
61. You've tried to find the Amityville Horror house.
62. You've driven around endlessly and always manage to find your way home.
63. You complain about the increasing amount of malls, yet you shop at them all anyway.
64. Each one of your diverse friends mercilessly makes fun of his own background.
65. You love that salty smell of the ocean.
66. When someone says, "what are we going to do tonight?", you know you will be visiting the ATM at some point.
67. You know that the ocean makes everything a little better.
68. You are proud of where you come from when it comes down to it.
69. For the most part you're inconsiderate and you think that people love you for it.
70. You can call yourself a Long Islander but you have little interest in doing so-then you leave and become Mr. or Ms. Long Islander!
71. You have no interest in or knowledge of country music.
72. You are served by the best-paid cops in the country.
73. No, you don't want mustard on that burger!
74. How many times can YOU use the word 'like' in a sentence?
75. The most exciting day of your summer is when all tickets to every Jones Beach show go on sale.
76. You went to an elementary school that promoted dodge ball as the number 1 game among children 7-13.
77. You know White Castle is terrible for you and the food sucks. But, you periodically "Get the Crave"
78. You want the Yankees to stay in the Bronx, but would probably go to more games if they moved to Manhattan.
79. You can order a pizza pie and a soda and people will understand.
80. You've never taken an MTA bus.
81. You felt slighted when Snapple sold out.
82. You don't associate Fire Island with gay men.
83. If you wanted to, you've met Bobby Nystrom.
84. You wanted Hooters to open simply to piss off "decency" groups.
85. You watched a game show and wondered, "why are these people so happy that they won a trip to New York?"
86. You always remark, "Boy it would be cool to see Letterman". You do nothing to achieve that goal.
87. You are successful in avoiding Regis and Kathy Lee.
88. You're real fuckin' cynical.
89. You like The Brothers McMullen.
90. You've always thought Eddie Murphy was from Long Island but weren't quite sure.
91. When you hear Billy Joel's "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" you try to figure out what places on Long Island he's talking about.
92. You know that parts of the Godfather were filmed on LI.
93. You've said stupid things like "Strong Island".
94. You've paid a $10 cover charge to get into a bar, but got nothing for it.
95. You think religion doesn't affect you much.
96. You miss wiffleball and running through sprinklers.
97. You always liked Billy Joel, but as soon as you leave, you love Billy Joel.
98. At some point in your life, you've gone clamming.