Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together
in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister
had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church."
going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and
said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."
The kindergarten teacher was showing her class an encyclopedia page
picturing several national flags. She pointed to the American flag and
asked, "What flag is this?"
A little girl called out, "That's the flag of our country."
"Very good," the teacher said. "And what is the name of our country?"
"'Tis of thee," the girl said confidently.
After putting her children to bed, a mother changed into old slacks and a
droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children
getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. At last she
threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back
to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard her
three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was that?"
Two little boys were visiting their grandfather, and he took them to a
restaurant for lunch. They couldn't make up their minds about what they
wanted to eat. Finally the grandfather grinned at the server and said, "Just
bring them bread and water."
One of the little boys looked up and quavered, "Can I have ketchup on it?"
A new neighbor asked the little girl next door if she had any brothers and
sisters. She replied, "No, I'm the lonely child."
A mother was telling her little girl what her own childhood was like: "We
used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire; it hung
from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries
in the woods."
The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this in. At last she
said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"
My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how
you and God are alike?"
I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how
are we alike?"
"You're both old," he replied.
A little girl was diligently pounding away on her father's word processor.
She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked.
know," she replied. "I can't read."
I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided
to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She
would tell me, and always she was correct. But it was fun for me, so I
continued. At last she headed for the door, saying sagely, "Grandma, I think
you should try to figure out some of these yourself"
A ten-year-old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming quite
knowledgeable about the Bible. Then one day she floored her grandmother by
asking, "Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus: the Virgin Mary or the King
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. They
were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could
tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted,
"Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife.
When my daughter was about four years old, she still had a hard
time grasping the concept of marriage.
But anyway, I got out our wedding album, thinking visual images
would help, and explained the entire service to her. Once
asked if she had any questions, and she replied, "Oh. I see.
Is that when Mommy came to work for us, daddy?"
A mother took her three-year-old daughter
to church for the first time. The church lights were
lowered, and then the choir came down the aisle, carrying
All was quiet until the little one
started to sing in a loud voice, "Happy Birthday to you, happy
birthday to you......"
I had been teaching my three-year-old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer.
I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the
end of the prayer. "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us
some e-mail. Amen."