Page yourself over the intercom. (Don't disguise your voice.)
Find out where your boss shops and buy exactly the same outfits. Always
wear them one day after your boss does.(This is
especially effective if your boss is a different gender than you are.)
Make up nicknames for all your coworkers and refer to them only by
names. "That's a good point, Sparky." "No I'm
sorry I'm going to have to disagree with you there, Chachi."
Send email to the rest of the company telling them what you're doing.
example "If anyone needs me, I'll be in the bathroom."
"Hi-lite" your shoes. Tell people that you haven't lost your shoes
you did this.
While sitting at your desk, soak your fingers in "Palmolive."
Put up mosquito netting around your cubicle.
Put a chair facing a printer, sit there all day and tell people you're
waiting for your document.
Arrive at a meeting late, say you're sorry, but you didn't have time
lunch, and you're going to be nibbling during the meeting.
During the meeting eat 5 entire raw potatoes.
Insist that your e-mail address be
Every time someone asks you to do something, ask them if they want
Send email to yourself engaging yourself in an intelligent debate about
direction of one of your company's products. Forward
the mail to a co-worker and ask her to settle the disagreement.
Encourage your colleagues to join you in a little synchronized chair
Put your garbage can on your desk. Label it "IN."
Determine how many cups of coffee is "too many."
Develop an unnatural fear of staplers.
Decorate your office with pictures of Cindy Brady and Danny Partridge.
Try to pass them off as your children.
For a relaxing break, get away from it all with a mask and snorkel in
the fish tank. If no one notices, take out your snorkel and
see how many you can catch in your mouth.
Send e-mail messages saying free pizza, free donuts, etc... in the
lunchroom, when people complain that there was none... Just
lean back, pat your stomach, and say, "Oh you've got to be faster than
Put decaf in the coffee-maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten
their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.